A Sales Manager’s Letter to Santa

 

Posted By Alex Schutte | Dec 10, 2012

 

This time of the year always takes me back to my childhood—trimming the tree, spending time with family and loved ones, hoping it snows enough to cancel school, and writing my wish list to Santa. It got me wondering… now that I’m an adult, if I were to write a letter to Santa, what would I say?

As a marketer, many of our wishes are being granted with all sorts of new technologies, tools, analytics, and tactics that are constantly expanding the marketer’s toolbox, but there’s one group of professionals that could really use some love this time of year… Sales Managers.

I decided to take off my Marketing hat and replace it with a Sales Manager’s and write a letter to Mr. Claus on behalf of all the Sales Managers out there. Let’s hope Santa has us on the Nice list this year.

Read the letter below and leave a comment letting me know what you’d wish for. Happy Holidays!

A Sales Manager’s Letter to Santa

Dear Santa,

How do you do it? All those demands wishes from greedy cute kids across the world. All those houses to visit. I mean, what kind of mileage reimbursement rate does the North Pole offer?? You and your team of Elves work so well together to get all the presents done by Christmas every single year, and I don’t hear any stories about morale issues or turnover or failing to hit your projections. You sir, are my hero, Mr. Claus.

I know it’s been a while since I’ve written you, so I’m sure you’re a bit surprised to hear from me after all these years. Yeah yeah, so maybe I’ve added a pound or two and yes, I did finally get rid of those Star Wars pajama pants, but I still believe in you. And I’m hoping you can help out an old friend. I’ve been really good this year and have been trying really hard, but being a Sales leader is tough work. I know you may not be able to give me everything on my list, but does little Billy in Swampscott, MA really need another X-Box game?! Seriously. Just see what you can do for me, ok?

All I want for Christmas this year is:

  1. A crystal clear view of my pipeline so I can stop using the cross-your-fingers-and-guess method of sales forecasting.
  2. For all my sales people to spend more time selling and less time qualifying crappy leads and complaining about our CRM system.
  3. A CRM system that no one complains about (see #2) and that sales people actually want to use.
  4. New tools that my sales team will be excited to use and that help them spend more time selling (there’s pesky #2 again) and less time looking for stuff.
  5. Please turn all the marketing automation data that’s stuffed into our CRM into actionable next steps. Thank you.
  6. A better understanding of what sales rep activity works well and leads to closed deals. I’m tired of hearing, “well, my dials are up!”
  7. A marketing department for me…that understands my needs, my buyer personas, and creates awesome content specific to my deals.
  8. A way to ramp up new reps faster and equip them to handle every selling situation. Even on the North Pole.

Oh yeah… and I guess you can throw in the whole world peace thing too if you’re not too busy.

Thanks again, Big Red. And take it easy on those cookies this year.

Your friend,
Alex

P.S. I’m still waiting on that light saber, so if you ever dig one up I’d be happy to take it off your hands. You have my address.